Here's my story.
I am the eldest child of a Pentecostal missionary couple. I grew up in the cauldron of helping hurt people experience healing and help.
I have helped other people, some older and some younger, work through challenges and issues in their life for as long as I can remember.
Sometimes it was about finding direction in life and then other times it was about helping with their mindset and the way they approached life.
My coaching career started before coaching was even recognised as a known thing.
For many, I was the go-to guy. Parents would quietly pull me aside and ask questions about their teenagers, and husbands and wives would talk with me about their relationships.
But in 2010 I came face-to-face with something I did not know how to overcome by myself.
I simply called it 'The Lonely' and it came upon me slowly. I did not see it coming until one day I woke up to the experience of being trapped and it was like I was in a room with no windows, no sound, no escape.
I felt detached and isolated. People were all around me, but I felt myself shutting down and disconnecting from them. Even my family.
This couldn't be happening to me, I thought. After all, I was the certified master coach. I was the one that leaders of business and family came to for help, advice and wisdom. I had even written a book about rediscovering a meaningful and fulfilled life.
This could not be happening to me! But it was.
In 2010 I lost everything. My desire to participate as a parent, a husband and a friend was gone and along with it my confidence and my business. This season lasted for several years.
In 2013 just as I was moving out of The Lonely and reengaging with the world, I suffered a heart attack and then, again, just as life was beginning to feel somewhat normal, we lost our 3-year-old granddaughter to a tragic drowning accident.
I'm told we often review our lives by the decades we have lived. For example, in the '70s I left New Zealand and returned back to the USA for school. We say things like, "I left home and went out on my own in the '80s," or "We got married in the '90s." Well, the decade of 2010 - 2020 was the most challenging and character-building decade... not just for me but for my wife and family.
As a result of 'The Lonely', I realised that I was in a battle with two ruthless protagonists called 'Perceived Failure' & 'Imposter'. I could not fight this fight alone. I needed help, and I was not ashamed to admit this. I engaged a counsellor and a coach and with their help, I am now aware of and know how to confront these two protagonists.
Now I once again live my life with intentional purpose and direction, recognising my strengths, skills and values.